Striper Surf

Fishing through the pain

The city workers never stopped me from going to the old, broken spring, although one had said, the fish "not There is much here since we dredged last year. "

I often sought solace in the words. They told me not blame myself for catching Striped Bass only after many months of trying.

So with little expectations, I turned to walk toward the end of the gull inhabited by dock. One by one the beautiful birds spread their long wings and gray rose away. I felt I had been frightened of her house.

Segui.

At the other side of the wide and fast flowing river, the American flag waving me that the wind blew from the north, but not much. As strong winds were the only thing I like about fishing, I was grateful, and wondered whether I should go with a float or sink online.

I checked the sky. The cloud layer was crumbling, so I chose a sinking line, knowing that probably would not matter. I set up my nine-weight rod, looked at through my fly box and wondered, what should I try? A Clouser? An impostor?

I tied on a white Deceiver, then watched in awe gulls glided through the grace at the other end of the pier. Glad you had returned, I thought, If I could get my flight land as softly. I cast upstream, about twenty yards. Not bad. I undressed slowly, pausing every four or five seconds.

Suddenly, as if a light switch turns on, the sun illuminates the gold and raspberry red leaves of the trees on the opposite bank. Yes, Fall is always the prettiest time to fish. But soon the trees will look strange, mushroom-shaped webs. Soon it will be winter and too cold to fish. So why in this day soft, I'm the only one here? Is it because, unlike most fishermen, I'm not obsessed with catching fish? If so, is there something wrong with me?

A small Motor Boat approached. A middle-aged couple was on board. They took the hands. He greeted me. He smiled and waved back.

Any luck? "The man shouted.

I shook my head, and thought of how I never felt alone in the dock.

Once again cast. My tight loop cut through the breeze. My Deceiver turned and fell overboard. I was proud. Eighty feet. Yes, perhaps enjoying the satisfaction of making a good shot is what led me to the dock. But is there anything else?

I lowered my rod, threw all the momentum of my line and tried to repeat my beautiful cast. My back was tight loop. When deployed nearly enough, I started my forward cast. Perfect. quickened my energy supplement. But later towed. My main loop is opened in a large circle. My line and fly died little, and piled into the water. Disappointed, he quickly pulled to the limit of my line. I went back my regular. Maybe gets really bad are not so bad. Perhaps a fish will strike. Besides, my next cast will be better, I hope. Yes, to do better: how well it always feels, and how easy to do when the fishing. If only fixing my business had been so easy, but by the time I realized that the market had changed was too late. And it was also too time later the mother noticed that the cough may be a sign of something really serious? By then, the latest medical breakthroughs could not stop eating your cancer outside it, from leaving their living, breathing skeleton, and left me feeling of helplessness and anger in a God who seemed so brutal, so cruel. Why it causes so much pain? So much suffering!?

I could not answer the question answer - either now or later, so after the mother died pain overwhelmed me like lead. I could not find the energy to fish. Then the pain grew worse and seemed to become a dull knife slowly cutting and twisting through me. Afraid I was losing my mind, and my apartment walls were closing in on me like a vise, I said I had to go outside. But where? A voice told me my rod and reel. I hear? Took my rod out of your case. It seemed to shine like gold. I held the handle bar. The cork felt like silk, somehow comforting. I wore the vest fly fishing and looked in the mirror. Yes, it was a once a fisherman, once he loved being outdoors, especially in a river gurgling or soft waves crashing.

I took my rod and reel and approached the old pier. Again became a fisherman. Surprisingly, numbed my pain, perhaps even up, so that the next day I left again and then fishing for the next few years was all that really mattered.

Finally, slowly, my other interests - football, music, history - returned, but fishing is not rivaled in the spring, though he was on the go wrong.

I wondered if I should change flies, decided then, that with all that was happening, and seeming to embrace the beauty in a way that - yes - my mother did, fly fishing nature should not matter. I Deceiver stick with White. I lost my breath, and then reminded myself to break the wrist and out of my Fly Rod down at the end of my back cast.

It worked! My shot flying nearly a hundred feet, then landed gently on the surface. I smiled. Over half of the river, a flock of seagulls flew overhead. Its sharp chirps sounded somehow amplified by the peaceful vision of the orange sun setting and transmission hundreds of floating diamonds and is reflected in the gently flowing river.

The diving gulls. Bait, probably not present, nor it was striped bass.

She was not discouraged. So for the next few hours as the sky at dusk ripened rose, I cast again and again recovered and growing fast, in fear that soon the sun sank into the trees and rolling up his faltering steps crossing the gray water and seemed to stop at my dock.

Slow down. Do not worry about the sun sets. Be here tomorrow, and I, and not worry about the winter. Before long it will reverse and the bare trees bloom again with life, then perhaps the stripers return to the dock, but if they do, will it really matter?

No, because there is nothing broken, but fixable models.

About the Author

     I'm a native New Yorker. My writing has appeared in many publications, including The Flyfisher, Flyfishing & Tying Journal and Fishing And Hunting News. I'm also the author of the historical novel, The Fly Caster Who Tried To Make Peace With the World.

     Much of my writing is about the techniques of spin and fly casting and about the spirituality/recovery of fly fishing. I often fish the streams of Westchester, the piers of New York City and the lakes of Central Park.

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